How a TikTok trend to help moms became a money-grab opportunity

A sparkly silver purse, tucked between a bottle of baby lotion and Infants’ Tylenol at a retailer, sparked a recent viral trend. Denaesha Gonzalez noticed the purse (with the price tag still dangling) in the baby product aisle while out shopping. Assuming someone had put the item back on the shelf in order to prioritize their baby’s needs, Gonzalez posted a video on TikTok last month drawing attention to that anonymous shopper, saying “she deserved the purse.”

@denaeshagonzalez To the Mother who chose themselves last, you deserve the world tonight and always.🤎 #motherhood #motherhoodunplugged #parenting #parentsoftiktok ♬ original sound – 𝙅𝙖𝙘𝙤𝙗🇵🇱

@denaeshagonzalez To the Mother who chose themselves last, you deserve the world tonight and always.🤎 #motherhood #motherhoodunplugged #parenting #parentsoftiktok ♬ original sound – 𝙅𝙖𝙘𝙤𝙗🇵🇱

To the Mother who chose themselves last, you deserve the world tonight and always.🤎 #motherhood #motherhoodunplugged #parenting #parentsoftiktok

The video has since amassed nearly 25 million views. “I don’t think we realize how PROFOUND this work of art is,” one user commented. “A mother’s love on display,” wrote another.

But as with all good things, the feel-good trend swiftly came to an abrupt end.

First, the nice part: Inspired by the original video, TikTok creator Cecily Bauchmann hid a $100 Target gift card between a box of baby diapers alongside a note that reads, “Hey! You deserve that special ‘you’ thing 🙂 You are amazing! Xoxo!” Bauchmann encouraged others to partake in the pay-it-forward trend—now dubbed, She Deserved the Purse—and in the following weeks, hundreds of creators posted videos of hidden gift cards in the baby aisles at Target and other stores.

@cecilybauchmann Calling this SHE DESERVED THE PURSE🥹🫶🏼✨@Denaesha Gonzalez you inspire me mama🤍ilysm #momoffour #motherhood #momsoftiktok #realmomlife #womensupportingwomen ♬ Lights Are On – Instrumental – Edith Whiskers

@cecilybauchmann Calling this SHE DESERVED THE PURSE🥹🫶🏼✨@Denaesha Gonzalez you inspire me mama🤍ilysm #momoffour #motherhood #momsoftiktok #realmomlife #womensupportingwomen ♬ Lights Are On – Instrumental – Edith Whiskers

Calling this SHE DESERVED THE PURSE🥹🫶🏼✨@Denaesha Gonzalez you inspire me mama🤍ilysm #momoffour #motherhood #momsoftiktok #realmomlife #womensupportingwomen

And this is when things went haywire. TikTok users started joking about going into baby aisles to hunt for the hidden cash. Recent videos posted online appear to show people ripping open diaper boxes and removing the lids from baby formula cans, all in search of gift cards. “This is so sad and so wrong,” one TikTok user wrote. “The worst part is, I work in retail, & those damaged boxes will be marked as do not resale & thrown out due to contamination.”

“Leading to shortages, higher demand, & therefore higher prices,” another commented.

@valeriadiher She deserved the purse. But nobody deserves broken and tampered products over a trend… #shedeservedthepurse #momsoftiktok #babytok #babytiktok #pregnancytiktok #babyboy #babytrend #firsttimemom #newmom #newbornbaby ♬ original sound – Valeria | SAHM

@valeriadiher She deserved the purse. But nobody deserves broken and tampered products over a trend… #shedeservedthepurse #momsoftiktok #babytok #babytiktok #pregnancytiktok #babyboy #babytrend #firsttimemom #newmom #newbornbaby ♬ original sound – Valeria | SAHM

She deserved the purse. But nobody deserves broken and tampered products over a trend… #shedeservedthepurse #momsoftiktok #babytok #babytiktok #pregnancytiktok #babyboy #babytrend #firsttimemom #newmom #newbornbaby

Here lies the problem with posting online about charitable giving for all the world to see. While the pat on the back might make you feel good in the moment, these kinds of posts are often performative at best, and can potentially cause more harm than good at worst, as seen in this instance.

One TikToker, who posted the video of her local store, summed up, “Can’t we just let a good thing be good?” And if we can, let’s keep it to ourselves.