5 steps to addressing behavior changes before they become performance issues

When it comes to people management, too many leaders wait until small issues turn into big problems. A staff member’s behavior change might seem minor at first, but when left unaddressed, it can snowball into conflict, burnout, or poor performance. The truth is, that addressing behavior changes early—when the first signs of trouble appear—can prevent uncomfortable conversations from spiraling into disciplinary actions.

By saying it sooner, you can avoid bigger problems. Here’s how.

Notice behavioral change early

Behavior is part of performance. It’s not separate. Too often, we focus solely on results—hitting KPIs, and completing tasks—but overlook how people show up and interact with others. You might have someone who’s a top performer in output but is bringing negative energy into the team, speaking rudely to colleagues, or reacting poorly under stress.

As a leader, it’s your job to notice these things early. Take an active interest in how your team behaves, not just what they achieve. When you pick up on these behavior changes, don’t ignore them in the hope they’ll resolve on their own. They rarely will. Your early intervention can make all the difference.

Open with curiosity, not accusation

When addressing behavior changes, lead with curiosity. Start by making an observation and asking questions rather than making accusations. For example, you might say: “I’ve noticed you seem frustrated and stressed lately. When Kim asked you a question this morning, your response seemed abrupt, which is unlike you. Are you okay?”

This approach shows genuine care without accusing the person of anything. It may be that something is going on in their personal life that’s affecting their mood. While this doesn’t excuse poor behavior it’s context that may help explain it.

Crucially, this conversation happens early—before the issue becomes a serious problem. By catching it early, you give the person a chance to reflect and adjust before things escalate. Often, they may not even be aware their behavior has shifted.

Show empathy and compassion

Once you’ve raised the issue, listen with empathy and compassion. They might be dealing with stress, personal issues, or feeling overwhelmed at work. Whatever the reason, it’s important to acknowledge their emotions or perspective—without excusing their actions.

Repeat what you’ve heard to confirm you understood and ask what support they need. Perhaps they could benefit from time off, or additional guidance. Offering practical support, like connecting them to your company’s employee assistance program (EAP), shows you care about them as a person.

This isn’t about letting them off the hook for inappropriate behavior changes but understanding it and supporting your team member through their challenges.

Set clear expectations

Empathy without accountability won’t resolve issues. While showing care is important, setting clear expectations is also vital. This is where you establish boundaries around what is—and isn’t—acceptable behavior.

Brene Brown’s “what’s ok, what’s not ok” approach is helpful here. For example: “It’s okay to feel frustrated when Kim asks a lot of questions. But it’s not okay to be dismissive or abrupt when she asks you one. I need to see you helping each other out, and if you feel she’s not doing the necessary thinking before asking, bring that to me so I can address it with her.”

Being explicit about what you expect leaves no room for misinterpretation. Be clear about the behavior changes you want to see moving forward and make sure your team member understands that while you’re supportive, there are still standards that must be met.

Follow up

Too many difficult conversations are treated as one-and-done. This is a mistake. You need to keep an eye on the individual’s progress and ensure they’re meeting the expectations you’ve set. Check in regularly on how they’re doing and offer ongoing support if needed.

A simple follow-up can be as informal as a quick chat in passing: “How are you going with things since our last chat? Is there anything else you need from me?” This shows you’re still invested in their progress and haven’t forgotten about the issue.

The power of saying it sooner

Avoiding these conversations might seem easier, but in reality, it’s not. Addressing behavior changes early prevents small problems from growing into larger ones. You maintain a positive team dynamic, uphold standards, and show your team members that you care about them—not just as employees, but as people.

So, say it sooner. It’s better to have a curious, compassionate conversation now than get stuck dealing with a formal performance management issue later.